As you all know, geekboys and -girls (especially girls), "The Chronicles of Riddick" opened up last night... I guess I'll go see it... if i HAVE to... *sigh*. I suppose it's my duty as the Queen of the Geeks to go and just be sure that it's up to par, right?
Riiiiiiiiggghhhhht. :D
Y'all are probably all shocked that I didn't go last night, but we had Chris' family b'day dinner at Outback, and tonight he has to work, so we're going tomorrow night. YAY!!!! :D :D :D
Stewart sent me this great interview, and as we are gearing up BIGTime for con - plotting and planning LOTS of fun uber-nerd activities* - and also starting up our own D&D campaign again, finally, I thought I would share just one excerpt from this lovely man's lovely interview:

"Diesel is that rare breed of Hollywood star, one that tries not to take himself too seriously as a star, but as an actor, well that is a horse of an entirely different colour. This is a man who was brought up on a world of fantasy, and, like a grown-up child, sparkles at the very mention of one of his primary influences: Dungeons and Dragons. Or perhaps, one questions, it was just a rumour that Dungeons has spoken to the child within for some two decades. He rolls back on his chair and merely smiles. "I never play D&D," he begins with mock seriousness. "For some reason, they thought that I played D&D for 20 years. They thought that I spent years playing Barbarians**, Witchunters the Arcanum. They thought I still played D&D back in the '70s when it's just the basic D&D set. They thought I continued to play D&D when it became Advanced Dungeons and Dragons. They thought I played D&D when there were only three books - the Player's Handbook, and the DM's Guide. They thought I played D&D as it continued onto the Unearthed Arcanum, Oriental Adventures, Sea Adventures, and Wilderness Adventures. They thought I played D&D at the time when Deities and Demigods*** was the brand new book. They thought I played D&D when I used to get up to a place called The Complete Strategist in New York." We get the point as he smilingly mouths: I'm into D&D a lot****. "It was a training ground for a lot of my adventures."

Y'all KNOW he wants me, right?
Sorry about all the photos, but you know I just can't resist. I found it interesting that this particular magazine cover had both "The Next Big Thing**" and "Greatest Show on Earth***" (quite interestingly placed) on the cover...
*sigh*
Go see 'Chronicles' (and all the other great nerd-films coming out this summer - Harry Potter III was by FAR the best HP yet! WOW!), dust off your DM screen, get out your dice, and GEEK OUT! Hope to see you ALL at con! SHARKBAIT, OOHAHA!
MUCH love,
-sambolina 'pie QotG!


*"SHARKBAIT! OOHAHA!" heh heh heh...
**it's ok, i'm ok, i'll be fine... just let me get up off the floor...
***, no really, i'm fine. i'll be fine.
do you think they're dating? oh my god. ok, maybe i DO need some smelling salts, or a cold shower, or... something.
****on behalf of the Geeks of the world, we thank you, Vin. *MWAH!* xoxoxoxox

So FINALLY I have the sort of boyfriend who will lie in bed with me, being lazy and fantasizing about ...
... how GREAT it would be to have a tank*! Yay, me!
I was telling him that I’d always wanted one of those mini-bulldozers, anyway, and wouldn’t that make a great little cute little tank? (moogiemoogiemoogie!) I mean, it’d be really hard to actually hurt much with it... I probably couldn’t run over a whole bunch of po-lice (pronounced 'po-leese') cars or any, um, completely random and hypothetical auto body detailing shops... near Tryon. But actually in South Carolina....
... durnit.
Chris then said that it might be neat to just build something to squush**, and we began to dream up this GREAT "installment/performance art" idea.
What I would do is get some nice city to lend us a bit of park area (which we would take good care of while we did this). We would designate our work area, and then set up two building spaces in there (cordoned, and with good safety parameters, of course.). One corner would be the place for building the tank onto the minicrawler. The other would be for the building construction. I would get a crew together, six people total, maybe. Three for the buildings, three for the tank, (ooh, paintball gun turrets, loudspeaker…) and we could interchange between building projects as needed. For example, we’d probably need all six to lower the tank shell over the crawler frame... Maybe 8 people, who knows. Six seems about right, though. We could spend, say, 42 days, camping on site, and building this little tank and this little ‘city’. Maybe we could get an outside crew – like my brother – to build some little scale cop cars… mooowahahaha! The public could come and watch us do this, all throughout the process. At the end, I would get to climb into that little tank and RAMPAGE!!! RAAAR! YEAH! WHEEEEE!
Wouldn’t you like to come see that? And kids would LOVE it. We could take up donations to pay for the materials, and, and, and, maybe they’d let me keep the tank...
No?
Oh well.
So, if any wealthy art aficionados read this, or any brave city managers with something extra in the budget for community art, or anyone with a used minicrawler they’d like to donate, then please, sign my guestbook and let me know! We’d LOVE to bring this show to YOUR town!
Support the arts!
love,
-s

*you know, after reading this sentence, I thought 'wow. What a couple of weirdos. We deserve each other.'
**that’s pronounced "skwuhsh". rhymes with "mush", as in "rooms".

Today's rant is courtesy of Aunt Sue. I wrote her a long e this morning and realized that it encapsulated today's news just fine. I did edit out a personal thing or two, just so Susie and I could keep some things between us, but I didn't think she'd mind me sharing the news. I left in the good links I sent her, too.
Much love,
-Sam

Good morning, SusieQ!
Well, I got depressed last night and did something drastic. I did the SECOND worst thing a woman can do when she is down and craving change (#1 is getting married.) I cut my hair.
I've only ever trimmed my bangs before - never the "full nelly". My early attempts at cutting my bangs were TERRIBLE. I put up with months of bad hair after those miserable failures (one right before my wedding. *sigh*). I finally learned to trim my bangs nicely - and sparingly (thanks to Baron, my wonderful barber), but that took about 30 years!
Last night we were trying to get ready to go to Asheville to see our friends' sitcom, like we always do on Wednesday night, and I felt fat, and yukky, and discontent with my whole life. I cried, threatened to shave my head, quit my job, run away from home, etc. and poor Chris sat there with me and encouraged me to tell him all. I did - and he still likes me (go figure), but then I convinced him to go on without me, because it was his birthday-eve, and our friends were expecting us.
As soon as he was out the door, I got up, poured a glass of wine, and went straight to the bathroom and got the scissors. Nearly two hours later - the glass of wine still almost untouched (if you can believe THAT!) I had me one of the cutest little haircuts you have ever seen! It's a nice, neat little 20's bob, slightly longer at the front than the back, which is cut close to my hairline at my neck, in a little curving arch. Yes, I even managed to cut the back myself! I still have some chin-length curls to frame my face and set off mama's cheekbones, too. I can't wait to see Baron and ask his opinion. I don't think he'll be mad at me for cutting it myself. He has often told me that he believed I'd be a really good hairdresser. The last time I went for a trim, I told him that if I was a hairdresser, I would think of each head as a sculpture, and then cut the hair like that, so when I pulled out the scissors last night, that's what I thought about. That's also why it took so long - that, and trying to get to the !@#$ back! ;)
I thought you'd be proud of me for that. We both know that it could have been a TERRIBLE disaster, too. In fact, probability-wise, it should have been. I found out this morning, when I called to see if he'd be in after I get off of work, that Baron (and his parents, the other two employees of Smith's Barber Shop) have gone to DC, and won't be back for DAYS! :O Lucky me, huh? I would have had to wear a hat and scarves to work for the next three days!!! :D
I scared Chris to death last night, too. He knew I was sad when he left, so when he came home, I made him go in my room and sit down and turn off the light, while I waited in the bathroom. I told him that I had done something drastic - and he remembered me saying that I was going to shave me head - so he had to wait in the dark to find out. I played it all serious, too. I came in and sat beside him - he tried to feel my head to see if I was bald!!! I told him that I had cut my hair, and I wanted to prepare him. Then I turned on the light. I wish I had a picture of the look of relief on his face!!! :D You would have laughed SO hard, Susie!
Today is his birthday, and we have the whole day planned. This morning I got up early, bathed (put on a pretty dress and some lipstick to show of my new do), then got him in the tub, fixed him and iced coffee, and then out on Billy Joels' greatest hits (he LOVES Billy Joel. Man after your own heart, huh? :) He got dressed and said he was going to treat me to Waffle House.
On the way, I stopped by Mr. Camp's house at the bottom of the hill. He cut me a whole bunch of pretty gardenias so I could do my yearly "Gardenias for Ladies" day. He is such a nice man.
I had Chris drop me off at the Waffle House on his way to get $, I told him I'd get us a table. I had a little birthday candle in my purse, and I slipped it to our waitress and asked her to bring him a Honey Bun after breakfast with the lit candle. We had a nice breakfast. I talked with everyone around us, and gave away several of my gardenias. After we ate, Kat brought the Honey Bun out with the lit candle, and we sang happy birthday. Then she told Chris that it wasn't an official Waffle House Birthday unless he got "smudged", and she smooged whipped cream on his nose!!! THEN she told him his breakfast was on the house! Nice, huh?
Then he drove me to work, and headed back to the house. One of his presents from me was a video (that I got brand-new in the book sale for $1.00 - woohoo!) and he said he was going to go home, watch that, and nap. I worked on Tuesday morning for Gigi, so I get off at 1:30 today. He's going to pick me up, and then we're going to go to his mom and dad's for a cookout lunch and his favorite cake (another good reason to dress up a little. I like to impress his mom. :). After that, we'll go to the grocery and pick up some snacks for tonight. Stewart is running our first d&d game in MONTHS - maybe almost a year, at his nice house tonight. Sarah, my best co-worker girlfriend will be there, and our friends Jamie and Erin. We're going to make lots of bad junk food (Chris and I are making chips and queso and Texas caviar), and Chris has requested a store-bought red-velvet cake (Ingles, not Bi-Lo), which is also Stewart's favorite. And I will make my famous iced coffee. Woo! We are gonna' be awake all night! :)

Oo! We just had some minor drama in the library, too. This older gentleman came in, and he was looking a little... 'chemically distracted'. He started saying some wild - but not mean - things, and then HE STARTED TAKING HIS CLOTHES OFF!!! :O
He really wasn't a bad man, just a little drunk and a lot mentally ill, I think. But when he went into the children's section and opened his shirt to a sweet Grandma, Miss Ann Stewart, and her little grandaughter, Heather. He was asking them how old they thought he was and if his shirt being open bothered him - thank the Lord Jesus that Miss Ann had the wherewithal to nicely tell him "YES!", so he did button it up for a minute, but that distressed me, so I called the police station (which is maybe 100 yards from here). There was no answer, so I called town hall, and Doris sent our wonderful new Town manager, Ernie Williams down (he is absolutely fantastic. I keep telling him I wish he would run for president...).
Ernie came in and gently engaged the man in conversation, got him to sit down, put his shoes on, and then walked him down to the cafe for a cup of coffee. (Andy Taylor style. :) THEN, five minutes later, the Chief of Police, Kevin (who's also a very nice guy), and his sidekick ... (let's just call them Barney and Gomer) pulled up at the front door. I heard Kevin say "I'll go around the side!", like we were having a hostage situation in here or something! Then 'Gomer' came in the door WEARING RUBBER GLOVES!!! *sheesh*.
Well, that's our excitement for the year here in old Saluda! ;)
I love you SusieQ. Here are some fun word-puzzle sites to loosen up those cogs, and I think that, since this letter comprises all of today's news, I am going to reprint it as my 'rant' today. Thanks!
Wishing you an unrusty mind, some big love-feeling, and gardenias today [and that goes for all of y'all out in Day-Off land, too!),
-Sambolina

Ursula - one of my Non-Imaginary Badass, Smartass, Redhead, Frazetta-type (but with MUCH bigger... BRAINS, you perves) Heroines - said something really wonderful to me a few weeks ago, I think during Faire breakdown. She said that she'd been listening to this album lately, and every other song on it made her think of me. When I asked what it was she said "'Still in Hollywood', Concrete Blonde." What a fantastic compliment, Ursi. Thank you. Great album, too, but then neither Concrete Blonde nor Johnette have ever made a bad album, so there.
She mentioned this again at the party on Saturday and I told her that I would love to hear that album again (she had it with her, and she shared! YAY!). Somehow, mysteriously, every CB album I buy disappears. Maybe that just goes to show that (a.) they really are one fantastic band and (b.) I have had some pretty !@#$% acquaintances over the years. Oh, I forgot (c.) both of the above.
Johnette is one of those women - like Ursula - that I could not help but admire. Ms. Napolitano is certainly not the natural beauty that our Ursi is*, but they both are WAAAAAY smarter than the average bear, they are brave, tough as hell, and not afraid to say what they think. YAY!
Johnette also has a voice like no other, and their sound is like Johnette says in 100 games of Solitaire, "... a train from Mexico to New Orleans and back again..." and don't forget to throw in the bottle of Tequila, too.
I told Ursula that I could probably guess the songs that made her think of me, but after the bulldozer rampage rant, and my ensuing train of thoughts, I thought this might be a good one to share.

Probably Will


They say I may be crazy,
I only say I've had my fill,
They say I'll throw it all
I probably will.
They'll only give you what you're taking,
But lately I've been unfulfilled,
They say I'll probably blow it off someday I probably will.
The way they talk about each other,
The way they talk about themselves,
Well they could talk, talk, talk forever,
And they probably will.
You know they probably will.
Now I'm not really bitter,
You know I'm just a little chilled.
They say that things can just get better,
And they probably will.
And they will only make us stronger,
If they should try to keep us still,
And we could rise and take it all,
Someday we probably will.
The way they talk about each other,
The way you talk about yourselves,
Well you can talk, talk, talk forever
And you probably will.
You know you probably will.

***

GO BUY SOME CONCRETE BLONDE, PEEPS! And I will leave you with a few other lyrics of theirs, from a favorite - 'Bloodletting', that echoes my sentiments very well today - and lots of days:
"I got the ways and means
To new orleans I’m going
Down by the river
Where it’s warm and green
I’m gonna have drink, and walk around
I got a lot to think about oh yeah..."

(but you gotta have that bass line to get it all...)
much love, peeps. Meet you on the levee?
xoxox
-s

*though I do think she's pretty darned cute. She looks like Wendy O's baby sister... :)
here's some more Wendy O pics, just for comparison's sake... not just to up the Badass factor of this rant by 10,000 points. Really.
And not to just make 9 out of 10 moms mad, either.

In recent news:

The cast part at Bruffy's was GREAT! When we got there, there were about a MILLION people there. Ok, not really, but it seemed like it, and it was SO great to see so many of the crew and find that they were happy to see me - slave-driving director that I was. It looks like the plotting and planning for next year has already begun. In a subtle maneuver that might have moved even Machiavelli, I managed to help water the seed of next year's plot (suggested by Brett and Stewart), shift MY old job off onto - I mean into the capable hands of some folks who will enjoy it, and will kick some major BOO-tay at it. I made a few suggestions about cast structure and good ways to limit the main cast and number of shows and keep things simple, while still utilizing everyone who comes to audition; and otherwise generally passed the buck. Everyone that was in on the discussions seemed both excited and motivated about the possibilities of the plot, so yay. And it just happens to conveniently go right along with what we are planning to do, too. I also liked the suggestion of changing the ad-title to [in small print]
"Mountain Renaissance Adventure Faire Presents: [in large print] MountainFaire!" That is just SO much better, and it keeps the whole history-nazi issue at bay, too.
I joked that discussing faire AT ALL so soon after was making me twitch, but since I am just talking in a purely advisory capacity, it really wasn't so bad. I think people know that I have a good idea of what the headaches are now*, and I can answer questions and give suggestions on all the creative aspects, and it's nice of them to ask without expecting me to just DO IT. Those days are WAY over. Red tape and bad management in general have burned me out BIGtime. Plus, I've done my MRAF miracle for the decade. I just wanna play my scenes, busk my crowds, have a beer after with my cronies, and go home. [contented]*sigh*

In other news - LISA IS COMING TO DRAGONCON!!! For those of you saying "Who the !@#$ is Lisa?", well, Lisa was one of my co-miracle-makers (directors) this year - she directed the chessboard (which was FABULOUS) and she was also the lady with whom I took my overnight trip to Fat City last October. Lisa is gunna have a BLAST at DragonCon!!! :D Woohoo! One more Virgin!
Chris, MAYbe Kaysha, and Lisa! MoooWAHAHAHA! Looks like there's gunna hafta be a Geek Patrol Initiation Ceremony this year! (SHARKBAIT OOHAHA! SHARKBAIT OOHAHA!)
WHEEEE!
ok, time to go. More news later, taters!
xoxox
-sam


*HA! understatement of the week, at least!